A few of my favourite things

[quantumcupcakes]

Most friending memes or communities that I've come across seem to want you to list out your top fives, your favourites and that is not something I am particularly good at. I can either name nothing because you've put me on the spot and I've panicked, or you'll never shut me up because you've asked me to talk about things I love

I understand why it's a popular question. It's something people can bond over, there's that automatic 'oh, you like the same things as me', it's a starting point for conversation and it gives a common ground to start a friendship from.

I also wish I wasn't quite so 'shy' online. I'm not in real life, I'm a sociable woman who will chat away to anyone but the idea of commenting on peoples posts is somewhat nerve wracking. When it's just words, outside of academia, I lack confidence. I don't know how to properly convey myself, to express what I'm thinking and feeling. I rely as much on body language, tone, facial expression, gesture as I do words and not being able to use them.

I'm also somewhat unsure of how to introduce myself. My standard little profile blurb of

My name is Samantha and I’m a Welsh geek who loves to bake, especially cupcakes. I also have a passion for physics, engineering, mechanics, floral dresses, rugby, 80s pop music and science fiction

doesn't seem quite enough. It is a nutshell varient of me although it seems so much of what I think makes me is missing... but I'm not entirely sure what does constitute a proper introduction/profile, what information is pertinent or interesting and what I can say that makes me 'attractive' to other people.

Especially as I don't think of myself as a fandom person

This all makes the whole friending issue somewhat difficult.

Jack says I'm overthinking it. Lucy says I need to just be myself. Both of which are simultaneously true yet rather unhelpful.

Comments

[silveradept]

It's difficult to capsule-summary yourself if you haven't been in a small number of fandoms (and for some fandoms, a small number of relationships or ideas) for all your existence. Because whichever ones you choose, someone else might pass you over because you didn't choose the one you share.

I have trouble with selling myself, too, on those lists. It can also be more difficult to find a good friend if their journal space is all access-locked, c you don't have shared comment spaces.

So, if you figure out a good way of summarizing, would you let me know, too? I've been looking for that for years.

[quantumcupcakes]

For me as well, online fandom is a completely new thing. I've always fallen in love with stories and characters in tv, books and movies but other than close friends and family, it wasn't something I talked about. Enough women in real life find me weird enough as it is. Finding that there are whole communities of people on the internet who love sci-fi is wonderful.

Shipping and fanfiction are also entirely new to me. My girlfriend introduced me to the concept this summer. Not something I'm sure I'm especially invested in though, much further than the idle thought of it being hot.

I'm almost happy with what I've got in my mini-bio at the moment. Almost. I still feel it's missing something but I haven't figured out quite that that thing is.

[silveradept]

It is a fine art, figuring out what to put in that captures you.

Also, I'm rather glad you got introduced to a community that let's you talk about the things you're interested in, without the judgement for being called weird.